Making your way up to the registration
Hoping they don’t confiscate your Logan’s Run gun
The hotel staff really seems impressed
They’ve never seen Zardoz fully dressed
Just don’t go to that secret floor
Strange goings-on behind that door
What the heck, you only live once
And your friends will be talking about it for months

What happens at the con, stays at the con
That’s all the information you need
Come Monday morning they’ll forget what went on
Strange goings on indeed

Over there that’s Megatron
Taking a whiz on the hotel lawn
Wonder Woman’s up on the balcony
Flashing her goods for everybody to see
And there in the corner she sits
Tank Girl drunk in her Alphabits
Vader took a swing at a tusken raider
Who took a nasty fall down the escalator

What happens at the con, stays at the con
It’s really not supposed to make sense
Come Monday morning they’ll forget what went on
Debauchery and decadence

Where else would you go
To see Sailor Moon in the hot tub with Frodo

Go in that room, you’ve got nothing to lose
That’s where the Romulans keep the booze
Two parts tequila, one part lemonade
It makes for a pretty fun masquerade
Walking down the hall and feeling pretty high
I think I’ll go give DDR a try
Stumble on the squares, oops, taking a fall
Wait, how did I end up back out in the hall

What happens at the con, stays at the con
That’s all the information you need
Come Monday morning they’ll forget what went on
Strange goings on indeed

What happens at the con, stays at the con
It’s really not supposed to make sense
Come Monday morning they’ll forget what went on
Debauchery and decadence