The Wrath of Con

by Possible Oscar

/
  • Digital Album
    Streaming + Download

    Immediate download of 14-track album in your choice of 320k mp3, FLAC, or just about any other format you could possibly desire. Download includes a digital booklet.
    Purchasable with gift card

      $7.99 USD

    You own this

     

  • Compact Disc (CD) + Digital Album

    Also includes immediate download of 14-track album in your choice of 320k mp3, FLAC, or just about any other format you could possibly desire.
    ships out within 2 days

      $9.99 USD or more 

    You own this  

     

1.
02:35
Making your way up to the registration Hoping they don’t confiscate your Logan’s Run gun The hotel staff really seems impressed They’ve never seen Zardoz fully dressed Just don’t go to that secret floor Strange goings-on behind that door What the heck, you only live once And your friends will be talking about it for months What happens at the con, stays at the con That’s all the information you need Come Monday morning they’ll forget what went on Strange goings on indeed Over there that’s Megatron Taking a whiz on the hotel lawn Wonder Woman’s up on the balcony Flashing her goods for everybody to see And there in the corner she sits Tank Girl drunk in her Alphabits Vader took a swing at a tusken raider Who took a nasty fall down the escalator What happens at the con, stays at the con It’s really not supposed to make sense Come Monday morning they’ll forget what went on Debauchery and decadence Where else would you go To see Sailor Moon in the hot tub with Frodo Go in that room, you’ve got nothing to lose That’s where the Romulans keep the booze Two parts tequila, one part lemonade It makes for a pretty fun masquerade Walking down the hall and feeling pretty high I think I’ll go give DDR a try Stumble on the squares, oops, taking a fall Wait, how did I end up back out in the hall What happens at the con, stays at the con That’s all the information you need Come Monday morning they’ll forget what went on Strange goings on indeed What happens at the con, stays at the con It’s really not supposed to make sense Come Monday morning they’ll forget what went on Debauchery and decadence
2.
There I was relaxed and watching Football on TV Once again she starts insisting That I deal with all those leaves How can I enjoy the game If I go outside? She tells me to move my ass Or they’ll be no action tonight Raking the lawn, raking the lawn (x4) So much for my lazy Sunday I start to complain My fantasy team will struggle If I don’t watch every game She says, “Dear, I just have One more task for you While you’re out there would you mind Cleaning the gutters too?” Raking the lawn, raking the lawn (x4) You don’t know what it’s like! Raking the lawn, raking the lawn (x8)
3.
Grammar police Arrest this nerd She often fails To conjugate a verb Her sentence tense is always wrong Grammar police Arrest this geek His clauses stink His adverb use is weak He’s dangling his participle This is a sentence Know the predicate Follows the subject And contains a verb Grammar police Apostrophes confound They can’t be used To pluralize a noun They show possession, omission Learn your alphabet Don’t trust your spell check “Their” will pass the test When you meant “they are” I before E Except after C, except after C I before E Except after C, except after C I before E Except after C, except after C I before E Except after C, except after C
4.
04:04
Your story was teased in Hulk 180 Then 181 your tale had begun Those big hairy arms, you can’t be harmed Smoke cigars, you’re short on charm Adamantium claws and skeleton Named Logan, Canadian Your secret past, you have no clue The best that there is at what you do Don’t let your rage grow high Wolverine, Wolverine You joined with a team, Giant-Size X-men 1 Written by Wein, art by Cockrum Cyclops in the lead, a new team revealed Storm rode the wind, Colossus skin turned to steel Nightcrawler had skill to relocate Although Banshee tried, could not change Thunderbird’s fate Don’t let your rage grow high Seem to be always in a fight With foes like Reavers and Alpha Flight Seem to keep young girls by your side Like Jubilee and Kitty Pryde Wolverine, Wolverine Don’t let your rage grow high Wolverine Don’t let your rage grow high Wolverine, Wolverine Wolverine, Wolverine Bloodlust Sabretooth Bloodlust Sabretooth As he tries to kill you They printed you more, soon we wanted you less Could not miss your likeness Celebrity sold toys, cartoons and films Well I might buy that new Wolverine grill Don’t let your rage grow high Seem to be always in a fight, fight, fight Wolverine, Wolverine Wolverine, Wolverine
5.
Dead Nintendo, why won’t you work like you ought to There’s one reason I bought you, for Mario Bros. Oh, your design flaw is that spring-loaded compartment I blew on the cartridge but the game still won’t load There’s no saving Princess Zelda, now She’s captured by King Ganon You know the Triforce won’t be found if you don’t start I can fight the mighty Metroids Samus’ right hand is a cannon But that power goes to waste if my screen’s dark Dead Nintendo, oh Castlevania’s waiting I’m hoping and praying, this kit does the trick And Punch Out, oh Punch Out, well I can’t wait to be champion I’ll challenge Mike Tyson just as soon as you’re fixed If I find at times that I can’t survive The secret code gives me 30 lives It’s hard to save the world without your help Your flashing light demands reboot Do you think those ducks are going to shoot themselves? Dead Nintendo, why do you choose to forsake me You’re this close to making me throw you away I’m fairly angry, so there’s just one thing you can do You better let somebody play you (Let somebody play you) You better let somebody play you, before it’s trash day
6.
WYNGARDE: Have you seen the latest box office numbers? ALL: (grumbling) LUKE SKI: Our revenue has been trending down for years now. BUD: It certainly isn’t the quality of our product. DEVO SPICE: Piracy is killing us. LUKE SKI: So how do we reverse the trend? DEVO SPICE: We could try telling good stories again. ALL: (laughing) WYNGARDE: Seriously though, We should continue to make movies that feel familiar and appeal to the broadest possible audience. Any suggestions? Earn Hollywood earn our revenue is going down Need a hit that will not bomb So let’s remake a movie Update a classic film just to prove we Can take an old idea and just revise The plot and characters how we like Cause all we care about is not selling out And front-loading the box office roll out So we’d never stick our necks out On films no test audience checked out Hollywood or wood chuck wood How much would you chuck just to make a buck But some films we’ll never remake (haha) There’s no limit to what we’ll take For all the years we worked so hard The work is over, time to steal with no regard Earn Hollywood earn (repeated) That film is due for a sequel Just flip the script a bit and it’ll do well A fresh idea would be unwise We’ll make two or three and create a franchise Similar plot and cast would be safe Tell the same story in a different place Blockbuster box office just like the other Don’t mind the critics (*cha-ching*) another buck, er… As I channel surf from Nick at Nite to TV Land Thinkin’ how hard can it be to adapt One of these classic TV shows Of Darrens or Ralphs, Lukes and Bos Many would pay and cheer with glee To see their favorite show up on the screen All you really need to do is change thing or two Shoot the whole thing like a damn music video And old actors of shows adapted As for playin’ the lead part, not gonna happen For what they play cameo is the perfect role Even if since they’ve gotten old So let’s steal some ideas from old works Seems the best way to keep jobs and perks There’s nothing that we can’t regurgitate to earn Earn Hollywood earn Earn Hollywood earn (repeated) WYNGARDE: Now we’re considering you to take part in the writing of our next film. How do feel about writing situational comedy? MARSHALL: Yeah, I’m interested. You mean something like Harold Ramis or Woody Allen, right? WYNGARDE: Well, it’s a feature adaptation of Perfect Strangers starring Ben Stiller and Owen Wilson MARSHALL: Uh… Say what? BUD: Hey, hey, hey, We need to brainstorm ideas for our next feature. What do you got? LUKE SKI: I think we should return Blue Thunder to the big screen DEVO SPICE: What about Apocalypse Later? LUKE SKI: I know, we can update Dr. Strangelove and cast Steve Martin! BUD: Knot’s Landing could be a feature. Keep the 80s style and sensibilities and juxtapose them with the modern world! DEVO SPICE: Hold on, I’ve got it! ANNOUNCER: Ladies and Gentlemen. Tonight’s feature presentation, Welcome Back Kotter EVERYONE: (clapping, ad libbed self-congratulatory remarks) LUKE SKI: I love Hollywood, man.
7.
What’s filled with posts of merit but mostly Crap or a pic of my dog? I plead my case at an hourly pace My blog, blog, blog! My blog, blog, opinions can change every week My blog, blog, anonymous Internet geek Everyone loves my blog! Bookmark and save my blog! Comment and feed my blog! Everyone read my blog! (Gotta update my blog!) Everyone loves my blog!
8.
01:27
Just cause I love my figuas (hands to yourself, pal) I spend cash for my figuas (go buy us some new friends) Add another shelf for my figuas (can we get a hot tub too?) All I wanna see is right here my figuas (we’re gonna need that extra bedroom) You won’t take them from me baby! You will not take them from me baby! Ya know grrrrr (My figuas) some figuas look all constipated (My figuas) some figuas are articulated (My figuas) from sci-fi properties represent (My figuas) Star Trek (My figuas) Star Wars (My figuas) come battle-ready striking a pose (My figuas) use giant guns to vanquish all foes (My figuas) have facial scars and changeable clothes (My figuas) are bold (My figuas) so hot (My figuas) combine to form a giant robot (My figuas) have a cartoon where nobody gets shot (My figuas) transform but they’re never Go-bots (My figuas) are not (My figuas) unharmed (My figuas) are mostly kept sealed mint on the card (My figuas) make finding storage space rather hard (My figuas) I had to build a shed in the yard (My figuas) so far (My figuas) no fun (My figuas) take up half of my weekly income (My figuas) are a sickness that I suffer from (My figuas) cause women to walk and then run (My figuas) they run (My figuas) away (My figuas)
9.
You know I never I never had much luck with girls They never like to read and learn But I like to And if I could figure out The cosine of your heart That’d be a good start Oh yes it would I never I never try to date offline Use algorithms built to find My Seven of Nine So if you look half as great As Aeryn on Farscape You’ll be my first mate Cause baby we’ll be In the chat room On the IRC Out at the Big Con Star Trek costume for me Down in the dungeon Role play D&D And baby Talk nerdy to me You know I dress up Like Jedi Knights or Klingon guys My phaser gun is set to fry I’ll be your fanboy And my Starfleet uniform It matches the one worn By Leonard Nimoy Cause baby we’ll be In the chat room On the IRC Out at the Big Con Star Trek costume for me Down in the dungeon Role play D&D And baby Talk nerdy to me PC, pick up that keytar and talk to me *Solo* Cause baby we’ll be In the chat room On the IRC Out at the Big Con Star Trek costumes for you and me Down in the dungeon And role play D&D And baby, talk nerdy to me, yeah And baby, talk nerdy to me, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah And baby ya know Talk nerdy to me (That’s the way I like it, baby)
10.
I’ve been playing too long Just beat this level, then off to bed The sun is rising at the crack of dawn I need a save point before my session ends Holy crap this boss looks like a mountain There’s no weakness I can see Never gonna beat this boss Never gonna win this game Never gonna find a way to defeat him Never gonna shoot his head Never gonna make him dead Never gonna have the health to beat him Unleash my weapon on full charge He moans and cowers But doesn’t lose his power Perhaps I need to strike from higher ground Feel like I’ve fought this beast for an hour Just as I sight his flashing weak-point He turns and runs the other way Never gonna beat this boss Never gonna win this game Never gonna find a way to defeat him Never gonna shoot his head Never gonna make him dead Never gonna have the health to beat him Never gonna beat this boss Never gonna win this game Never gonna find find the pattern to fight him Never gonna frag his brain Never gonna use grenades Never gonna find a way to smite him (Ooo… beat this boss) (Ooo… win this game) Never gonna beat, never gonna beat (Beat this boss) Never gonna win, never gonna win (Win this game) I think I’ve got it figured out If he can see me He’ll stop and fire his green beam And at that moment I can run around Attack his knees and his fleshy inseam Time to make my move and slay this creature [death sfx] Didn’t see that laser mine Never gonna beat this boss Never gonna win this game Never gonna find a way to defeat him Never gonna shoot his head Never gonna make him dead Never gonna have the health to beat him Never gonna beat this boss Never gonna win this game Never gonna find find the pattern to fight him Never gonna frag his brain Never gonna use grenades Never gonna find a way to smite him
11.
Hayden Christensen you’re in Star Wars And you try the dark side of the force To save, Padme Jedi council will grant you a seat But not the rank of master that you seek To be, you plead You’re murdering Jedi by the bunch There’s no time for a lunch They should have had a hunch Palpatine’s a dark lord of the Sith He says his power will fulfill your wish To save, Padme Hayden Christensen on Mustafar Battle sword to sword with Obi-Wan In turn, you burn You’re murdering Sand People at night Their heads roll side to side They took your mother’s life You’re murdering Separatist in stride The dark side is your guide You’re rage will not subside You’re murdering Jedi by the bunch There’s no time for a lunch They should have had a hunch You’re murdering Jedi far and wide The dark side is your guide You’re rage will not subside Hayden Christensen you’re in Star Wars And you try the dark side of the force To save, Padme But you’re murdering Yeah (hold), murdering
12.
PATRON 1: Hey dude, how’s it going man? PATRON 2: All right. PATRON 1: It’s been a while, man. A whole year! This con’s my favorite. Don’t you love it? PATRON 2: Yeah. PATRON 1: Aw man, you staying here? PATRON 2: Yeah. PATRON 1: Aw man, this is the best. It’s so cool to see everyone in costume and stuff. That one’s great. PATRON 2: Yeah. PATRON 1: Hey, do you gonna check out my room party tomorrow night? PATRON 2: All right. PATRON 1: Aw man, it’s gonna be the best. This is so awesome! Take it easy man. Weekend begins Redo my room Into Tatoo- Ine Cantina If you want to check out my party Opens after the masquerade PATRON 3: Hey, what’s up? PATRON 2: I dunno. PATRON 3: Did you see that new room party? PATRON 2: Yeah. PATRON 3: Um, I think I’m gonna go back later. They’re having a DDR contest. Wanna come with? At night, packed tight It’s hot as hell Weird smell, free food Free booze, and I yell If you want to check out my party Opens after the masquerade (after masquerade) Eat chips and candy, and drink blue liquid Prizes on the hour (prizes on the hour) We’ll have some fun If you want to check out my party Opens after the masquerade (after masquerade) Eat chips and candy, and drink blue liquid Prizes on the hour (prizes on the hour) We’ll have some fun If you want to come by the hotel Let’s hang out at the masquerade It’s good to see you standing there in your Superman costume Prizes on the hour (prizes on the hour) Let’s have some fun Free booze, free booze Free booze, free booze
13.
Standing on the bridge is Captain Reynolds Wash will fly the ship to the ground Jayne wants his grenades, Captain Mal vetos Zoe indicates we’ll burglarize, not occupy Job is going down until the Reavers Descend into the town, terrorizing Mule is given chase, faster is better Missing the grenades, against them all fights Captain Mal 4…3…2…1… Verse beyond us keep on flying Soaring reckless This boat is my home… Settling the job, they land in Beaumonde Kaylee has a want, “I can’t know that” River knocks out Jayne and several others Trigger flipped her brain, the tale is told, never gets old Contact Mr. Verse, can’t stop the signal Miranda is the word, secret broadwave Lost without a trace, the hidden planet Fly through Reaver space with damaged ship, “I mean to live” 4…3…2…1… Verse beyond us keep on flying Soaring reckless This boat is my home… A planet bathed in light, a secret message “We meant it for the best…”, then blood and gore Speech from Captain Mal, the time is coming Reveal the truth to all in the ‘Verse You all got on this boat for different reasons I’m asking for support, with this I aim to misbehave Verse beyond us keep on flying Soaring reckless This boat’s my home… Verse beyond us keep on flying Soaring reckless This boat’s my home… Verse beyond us keep on flying Soaring reckless This boat is my home… Home…..

about

The first full-length album from Possible Oscar is the perfect blend of comedy, rock and hip hop. Buying a copy might save a child’s life.

credits

released March 2, 2007

license

all rights reserved

tags

about

Possible Oscar Minneapolis, Minnesota

Possible Oscar is a Minneapolis, MN based comedy rock act that specializes in original and parody songs. Their musical topics range from video games to nerd love, with stops at comic books and notable Hollywood movie sound effects. Possible Oscar’s sound is two great tastes that taste great together; they usually play rock music, but sometimes a little hip hop is in order. ... more

contact / help

Contact Possible Oscar

Streaming and
Download help

Redeem code

Report this album or account